Well, how are ya? That is the most popular question I get. It is truly measured on a day by day basis. I find that I have less time to write when I feel good. When I feel bad I have lots of sit down time and write the “oh woes me”. Which I really try to spare you. It’s really not been so bad.
There is definite and ebb and flow to this lifestyle. So what’s going on now?
Well, I was diagnosed with Interstitial Cystitis seven months ago. This month I got the Post Tubal Ligation Syndrome label. I have begun the fascinating Perimenopause journey. In a really big nut shell, I have hormonal war drama! But what woman doesn’t, Right!
I seem to catch every cold, snotty contagion, coughing flem, and stomach woe around. That I find aggravating. I didn’t ever use to be this sick.
A few weeks ago I went on my own to town an hour away grocery shopping. What an experience. This was truly the first major uprising of the menopause mayhem. I was strangely disoriented and hot flashing but one must persevere.
To the orange store, I went to get rock for Hunny’s aquaponics. I bent down to look at the rock closer and whoosh- my equilibrium was a goner. I stood up and I could see the world spinning. I scrapped the rock plan. I went out to find the car and couldn’t remember where I put it. 😦
I went to Marshalls or Ross I think, I get them confused. Once in the store I realized I was in the wrong one. I wanted to be in the other. I humored myself by taking a browse anyhow. I picked up a cup with the serenity prayer on it. I began to cry buckets and buckets of tears like I’d just lost my favorite furry friend. A woman came down the row and was like pushing me out of the way with her basket. Can’t she see I’m having a moment? Pretend to go look at something else- why doesn’t she.. I wanted to have the cup but I didn’t want to get in line and talk to people. I was going to set it aside and at the last minute reluctantly decided to get in line. ‘Cause stealing is not cool even if you are flushed with heat, dizzy, and can’t think strait.
I continued on in my day and went to Kroger to get groceries. Quickly it was becoming apparent that I wasn’t going to be able to do that either. I grabbed the minimal amount of items and got in line. It seemed like I was there for ages. My daughter who’d been texting me said it couldn’t have been more that 30 min or so. I went outside into the blasting Texas heat and couldn’t find the car. I’d made a mental note of where I thought I put it but kept walking and walking. My daughter now completely in panic mode wants me to go back in the store as we are on the phone. I refused. Isn’t that what strong mom’s do? Hunny said, “That’s what stupid mom’s do- is refuse.”
I did find the car it was further than I thought and over a slight hill. It’s hard to hide a big black suburban.
Before you ask, am I taking medicine? Yes, I am on natural hormone replacement. It will take a few months for it to kick in and I’d not been on it but for a few days at this point.
Am I taking vitamins, yes I am but I have a limited spectrum there’s certain ones that I cannot take as it aggravates my bladder.
I was remembering last night about having a conversation with Granny many years ago. She told me that she had gone through menopause before she even knew what it was. She said that she would get hot and dizzy and just have to sit down and then get back up to go. That sometimes women would just fall out or faint because of the heat.
Us women all have to trudge this trail. I am not the first and most certainly not the last but this journey coupled with my chronic illness creates hormonal mayhem that is unpredictable and completely disobedient.
So, lets recap, I am in my thirty’s still and I had the tubal when I was 21. My doctor said, no way this is menopause yet, the average age is 51. Either my parents lied about my age or I am taking this pirate ship early.
My IC is better however; stressful situations like colds, flu, and hot flashes seem to cause flares. I have much pretty got down what I can eat and my diet has resumed to a very close reflection of normal.
There are some changes on the horizon of our lil farm. I’m excited about and it keeps me going. I enjoy my quiet time with the Lord and studying for our Fervent class. God really is so good to me- even when I don’t realize it.